ofliesandstories:

Does anyone remember the time Loki fucking made salmon for his friend in his apartment for funsies and the writers just SHARED the recipe?

Cuz I do.

Loki: I’ll bet my reputation on it!
Lorelei: Sorry, there’s a five dollar minimum.

hottopicshatterstar:

Operation: Stop My Mom From Asking About My Love Life Ever Again (An Agent of Asgard Fic)

Verity Willis is sick and tired of her mother signing her up for speed dating, so she decides to put an end to it. Unfortunately, her only friend is Loki, but Loki also just happens to be the worst hypothetical partner possible, which lays the groundwork for Verity’s first right and proper scheme: pretend to date Loki to convince her mom to never ask about her love life ever again.

• Chapter 1 – in which verity asks loki to fake date her
• Chapter 2 – in which verity and loki get invited to spend the night
• Chapter 3 – in which loki shapeshifts and verity and loki go to goodwill
• Chapter 4 – in which loki tries to reconcile with thor and verity calls lorelei
• Chapter 5 – 

  in which Loki tries to deal with the fact that thor isn’t ready to talk things out quite yet and verity and lorelei plan a girls and loki night out

• Chapter 6 – 

  in which loki and verity have a serious conversation and somehow stumble into a relationship

legit one of my favourite fics ever

Verity: You look happy. Let me guess. Your egg sandwich fell on the floor, and they gave it to you for free.
Loki: No. Can you do that? Why doesn’t everyone just drop their sandwiches on the floor?
Verity: I was trying to insult you.
Loki: And instead you gave me an amazing life hack!

Loki: Wow, gee willikers mister. I sure am sorry for slaughtering all your guards and tearing up your castle. I promise I’ve learned my less—
Malekith: *stomps on Loki’s hand*
Loki: —aww fuck! Take a joke, asshole!

howlingdawn:

I’ve finally been reading Agent of Asgard and I just- why is Loki losing a fight in a dumpster so in-character?

incorrectagentofasgardquotes:

Verity: Every talk I have with you people gets more and more absurd.

Lorelei: You say ‘you people’ like you’re not part of the family. Well, I’ve got news for you, sister. You’re already on the Christmas card.

Loki: Verity, we’ve known each other for a long time, right? You’ve come to respect me.
Verity: Sure.
Loki: Well, get ready to stop.