yourplayersaidwhat:

Context: D&D League game with 13 characters split over 3 ships: 1 normal seagoing vessel, 1 “Ghost ship”, and 1 airship. on the ghost ship is a cleric, a warrior, a bard, and me (a monk).  We have a Ranger flying outside the ship. The Ghost ship is crawling with undead, demons, and devils.

Ranger: I summon 4 bears onto the Ghost Ship.

DM: 4 bears appear on the ghost ship: a black bear, a brown bear, a grizzly bear, a big hairy gay man.

The entire table starts hysterically laughing.

DM: you didn’t specify which kind of bears.

commander-ledi:

i have uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh four personality traits. and they are

• chronic back pain
• monster fucking
• gay
• video game

curface:

purkinjebastard:

purkinjebastard:

Y’all I finally got my Meds refilled (fucking Walgreens) and I’m feeling super inspired. I’m gonna bedazzle a machete stay tuned

SIDE ONE DONE. I use E6000 glue so I’m gonna let it cure for a few hours, maybe overnight before I do the other side.

I THOUGHT IT WAS A HYPERBOLE

songsaboutswords:

arkilliandragon:

iamded-blog:

iamded-blog:

I was going through my emails and one of my online orders has been dispatched and when I ordered it I had to put in a state but New Zealand doesn’t have states and I was annoyed so I put “New Zealand doesnt have states you fuckass” and now in the dispatch email under delivery addess it totally has “New Zealand doesnt have states you fuckass” as part of it woops.

Yeah so

Yep okay

Sorry mail person

Omfg I can’t breathe

finally a tumblr story thats true